The Steelers will beat the Browns tonight.
Any questions?
Well, yeah, I've got a few, too, and they aren't anywhere as flattering as that forecast might come across. Because from the time the ball flies at 8:15 p.m. inside Heinz Field to the time Myles Garrett can focus fully on rehearsing his acceptance speech as Walter Payton Man of the Year, the home team will probably have to overcome more than this badly flawed, COVID-ridden Cleveland team being an unworthy playoff opponent.
So, in that spirit, here are seven things I'd really like to see tonight:
7. FANS
Sorry to start with something that's got no chance of occurring -- only family and friends will populate the 68,400 yellow seats -- but I did preface that these are things I'd like to see.
If this is, in fact, the season's final football on city soil, with a return visit next weekend to Orchard Park looming if the Steelers advance, I sure hope I never see the sight again. I'm almost as sick of sports in empty stadiums as I'm sick of the coronavirus itself. Oh, I get it. I'm not complaining about the priority, not with as many as 4,000 Americans dying daily, not with the pandemic peaking right here in Allegheny County. But that doesn't stop me from wishing all of it was different.
These are the playoffs. The Steelers. In Pittsburgh. Against an AFC North opponent that, while hardly a fully reestablished rival, has found its own annoying ways to be at least a little reviled.
And there'll be next to no one here.
Management's whipped up a wonderful gesture that the national NBC audience will see, with a giant Terrible Towel adorning the seats beyond the north end zone:

KARL ROSER / STEELERS
A giant Terrible Towel is added over the seats beyond the north end zone Saturday at Heinz Field.
Myron Cope would've loved it. I'm blessed to have become friends with the man late in his life, and that Towel meant the world to him and to the local special-needs school that still benefits from 100% of its proceeds. And he'd have loved all the more that the Steelers respected his original intention that the Towel only emerges for the playoffs, something that's been sadly forgotten by too many.
These are the playoffs. The Towel is back. But without the twirls, the roar, the Renegade ... ugh.
6. KEVIN DOTSON STILL PLAYS
This one might not happen either, but it's conceivable.
I'm not going to build up Dotson into some modern Alan Faneca. He's a fourth-round rookie. He's had a handful of fine performances. And there might be other, behind-the-scenes reasons to bench him tonight in favor of Matt Feiler, freshly back from a triceps injury.
But ... there aren't many people who've watched Dotson's performance these past five games, including people who know what they're watching, who'd dispute that Dotson's been the team's premier offensive lineman in that span. At run blocking. In pass pro. He hasn't just sealed opponents. He's pushed them back. He's pulled as needed. He's made a difference.
Can we realistically say that about anyone else on the line?
At any stage of the season?
Here's hoping the kid's still involved in some capacity. Because this call feels rooted in favoritism toward a vet, and I'll further presume it's because Mike Tomlin had to ask Feiler before the season to switch from right tackle to guard, which will hurt his paycheck someday.
5. PHYSICAL PLAY
Yeah, yeah, welcome to the Captain Obvious category.
But hey, in having covered all of this team's games from East Rutherford to here, I've observed one pattern that's held truer than any other: They'll show right away if they're invested/engaged in the moment by how hard they're pounding people. Both sides of the ball. All positions, even the wide receivers.
This has to be reset as their identity tonight, not just for what it'd mean now but also into a potential rematch with the Bills. The Steelers went into Orchard Park for blood ... for a half. And they were a better team than Buffalo to that point.
Other examples of the opposite: Dallas, Jacksonville, Washington, Cincinnati, the debacle against the Ravens' practice squad, etc.
4. NO BACKUP RUNNING BACK
Remember Le'Veon Bell limping off the field in Foxborough?
Remember James Conner limping off the field in ... everywhere?
When Conner stays on the job, he's by far the best the Steelers have. And that's got to hold up through this game. And through all of the remaining games, no matter how much that flies in the face of precedent. He's needed for the tougher yards. He's needed at the goal line. He's needed as a passing outlet. He's needed to pick up blitzes on Ben Roethlisberger. He's needed to kill the clock once there's a lead.
He's needed. Benny Snell ain't it. Anthony McFarland isn't ready.
3. NO BACKUP QUARTERBACK
I didn't get the Josh Dobbs thing when it was a figment of fans' imagination, and I definitely didn't get it when it played out poorly in Cleveland. Wishing really hard for something doesn't make it real.
This is Ben's game. I've no use for seeing him come off the field when the other guys will know the Steelers are now limited to either running the ball or throwing the ball with a lesser quarterback. No thanks.
Oh, and once more for everyone in back: This is Ben's game.
2. THE EDGE IS HELD
Only one player on the Cleveland side is capable of carrying the Browns to victory, and that's the immensely talented Nick Chubb, one of the NFL's top three running backs. He can blow through you, beat you to the outside, even break the big one, as he just did in Cleveland:
Nicholas Jamaal Chubb.
— Cleveland Browns (@Browns) January 3, 2021
📺: @NFLonCBS pic.twitter.com/9UV9aOc8U7
If the Steelers had a running back like that, they'd be favored to win it all.
As it is, they'd better stop him. If they do, they'll force the Browns to put the ball in Baker Mayfield's hands, which is a great place for it to be, from the Pittsburgh perspective. He's a mistake machine.
Cam Heyward's return will be meaningful, obviously, more from this facet than any other. If Chubb's going to do the kind of damage he'd need to drag the Browns into the next round, he'll have to beat Cam Heyward, Stephon Tuitt, Tyson Alualu and Vince Williams up the middle ... and good luck with that. Or he'll have to beat T.J Watt or Alex Highsmith to the edges ... and we'll see on the latter.
Highsmith's been encouraging for a rookie shoved into midseason starting duty, but most of his plaudits have been for his pass rushing. Where it's arguably the hardest to replace Bud Dupree is Bud's elite -- and I mean elite -- run-stopping ability. He wasn't great at this early in his NFL career, but boy, did that ever change the past couple years. Teams were nuts to even try his side.
Chubb and the Browns' coaches will find Highsmith. Take it to the bank.
1. PASSES TRAVEL FAR
No one needs elaboration on this anymore, right?
Think big. Throw big. The stakes are raised, and the offensive bar, the season-long bugaboo, has to follow suit. It's the only way No. 7 and his franchise will contend for championship No. 7.
